


Off The Rack

by Humansunshine



Series: Maia Month 2018 [17]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: F/F, Gender Dysphoria, M/M, Shopping, Transgender Author, mlm and wlw solidarity, transgender Magnus Bane, transgender Maia Roberts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-31
Updated: 2018-07-31
Packaged: 2019-06-19 12:31:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15509931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Humansunshine/pseuds/Humansunshine
Summary: Maia and Izzy need dresses for Magnus and Alec's wedding. Maia's never liked shopping.





	Off The Rack

**Author's Note:**

> This is the last in my Maia Month series, and it was prompted by thesorrowoflizards. 
> 
> "you did trans woman maia in a oneshot at some point (i don't remember when it was, i just remember thinking "omg.... yes..... of course.... maia is a trans woman... how have i been so blind....." i think it was your pride fic?) and i would LOVE something more centered around that? like trans maia and dysphoria, or how that effects saia (or pairing of your choice, like maiabelle or claia or whatever, i'm not picky)   
> or instead of (or both i guess?) a romance thing, (i would ADORE it if you did this and shower you in digital roses but you really don't have to lol) if there's trans magnus too (which is. my top headcanon oops) and some trans mlm/wlw solidarity and maia & magnus friendship. thereby combining both my favorite headcanons (that being, "all ur faves are trans" as magnus and maia are my faves lol) and one of my all-time favorite brotps (maia & magnus deserve more interaction!!)"
> 
> I think I managed to squeeze in everything you were looking for - I don't really like writing trans Magnus or depictions of dysphoria very much so I hope there's enough for you! 
> 
> Trigger warnings!
> 
> Dysphoria: Maia experiences dysphoria while shopping. She focusses on her shoulders and hips, mostly. 
> 
> References to transphobia: Maia mentions having trouble in the past shopping for clothes. None is described in-depth.
> 
> Self-esteem issues: Both Maia and Magnus describe feelings of not being good enough, but both instances of these feelings get resolved.
> 
> Jealousy?: Maia admits that she feels bad standing next to Izzy sometimes because she can’t help but compare them.

“We can take a break whenever you want.” Izzy reminded Maia as the escalator crawled up to the second floor. Her hand squeezed Maia’s fingers lightly. “No pressure.” 

The corner of Maia’s mouth pulled up, and she gave Izzy a kiss on the cheek. “I’m fine,” she assured her girlfriend. 

Both of them knew full well that Maia was, in fact, not fine. Clothes shopping was like Maia’s personal hell. Not only did she have to spend money she didn’t have, she had to deal with stares from prissy sales assistants, awkward encounters with fitting room clerks, and try her hardest to fight off the wildfire of dysphoria. It was easier when she had Izzy with her. Izzy understood better than most cis people, since her brother was trans too. She could also read Maia like a book, and knew when it all got too much. 

But Magnus and Alec were getting married in a month, and they both needed to find outfits. The colour scheme was navy, white and black, and they were under strict instructions not to wear white. Izzy was best woman to Alec, and she had a colour swatch for the navy of Alec’s tie. Maia wasn’t technically in the wedding party, but she’d be in the photos as Izzy’s girlfriend, so she knew she had to look good. As they neared the evening dress section, Maia started to feel a little sick. She was going to be too tall for these dresses, she told herself. 

“Babe,” Izzy pressed, rubbing Maia’s arm. “Are you sure you want to do this now? We can do this another day.”

“No, I just wanna get it over with.” Maia answered. “It’s not gonna be fun whatever day we do this.” 

Izzy pressed her lips together, her dark eyes empathetic. “I’m sorry I can’t make it better.”

Maia smiled a little, pushing Izzy’s hair behind her ear. “I know. I’m okay. Let’s do this.” 

She averted her eyes from the mannequins, because she knew that if she looked at them for too long, she’d feel like shit. Instead, she headed to the rack and looked for the longest dresses she could find, glad that there were lots of options for black dresses. Izzy left her to it, leafing through a different rack. 

The main issue Maia had was the size of her waist verses her shoulders. She had thin hips and broad shoulders, and dresses just weren’t designed like that. She pulled a few dresses out to look at them, but it was hard to visualise them on her. She knew that Magnus could have the waist taken in a little, but the thought of having her shoulders bare and having to stand next to Izzt made unease churn in the pit of her stomach. 

“What do you think of this?” Izzy asked, and Maia turned to see her holding a navy dress against her body. It was an inch off the floor, with a sweetheart neckline and no straps. 

“It would look amazing, but you’ll be pulling it up all day.” Maia answered, and Izzy hummed, holding it out in front of her again. 

“Yeah, you’re right, I need straps.” Izzy agreed, putting it back on the rail. “Has anything caught your eye?” 

“Not yet. I mean, a couple of them have nice styles but they’re not long enough.” 

Izzy came to stand next to her, looking at the rail before them. “Baby, we have Magnus.” 

“Yeah…?” Maia said slowly, and Izzy smiled at her. 

“Magnus can make anything fit.” 

Maia’s eyebrows rose. “Oh! That’s what he meant when he said he’d tailor them. He’s tailor them himself.” 

“You can’t find clothes that fit like his fit off the rack.” Izzy pointed out sagely, and Maia nodded, her heart lifting.

“Yeah, you’re right. Then, uh…” Suddenly everything seemed like an option, and Izzy smiled to see the enthusiasm bloom in Maia’s face.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They didn’t bother to try on the dresses in the fitting rooms at the store, which saved Maia a whole other headache. They just went straight to Magnus and Alec’s loft with their dresses. Magnus had one last appointment before he could see them, so they waited on the balcony, their dresses hanging up on the curtain rail in the living room. 

“I can’t wait to see you in your dress,” Izzy told Maia, nudging her with her elbow. “You’re going to look so beautiful.” 

Maia smiled at her, tilting her head to the side. “We’re going to be a pair to be reckoned with.” 

Izzy hummed, snuggling into Maia’s side. Maia put her arm around Izzy’s middle, kissing her temple. “It wasn’t too bad today, was it?”

“No,” Maia assured her, “it was nowhere near as bad as I thought. Usually the fitting room is the worst part, so knowing I didn’t have to bother with all that helped.”

“Good,” Izzy smiled. “Maybe in future you should just ask Magnus to fit all your clothes.” 

“Nah, it’s okay, he’s busy.”

“Never too busy for you, my dear,” Magnus insisted, coming out onto the balcony. “Especially if it means you avoiding god-awful fitting room clerks. They’ve been the bane of my life for centuries.” 

Maia sighed, shrugging one shoulder. “Sometimes you get lucky.” 

Magnus hummed. “Well, the offer’s there, should you need it. Now, let’s get these dresses fitted. The colour is perfect. The dresses match Alexander’s tie exactly. I should’ve known, with Izzy’s eye.” 

“It was easy since I had that sample,” Izzy waved away the compliment. “Should I change in the bathroom?” 

“You can use the bedroom.” Magnus told her. He watched Izzy go before moving to stand next to Maia, resting his arms on the wall of the balcony, looking over the city.

“How are you feeling?” Maia asked, her eyes on the horizon.

Magnus smirked. “That was my line.” He glanced sideways at her, clearing his throat. “I’m mostly stressed. The wedding feels like a distant dream away right now. I hope I get at least a day to just be excited.” 

“I saw Alec yesterday and it was like he could barely string a sentence together. Is he not sleeping?” 

“The Clave inspection could not have come at a worse time,” Magnus sighed, “I swear they’re doing it on purpose. But it’ll be over in a couple of days, and then Alec will just have one huge event to worry about rather than two.” 

“Yeah, that’s good.” 

Magnus looked at Maia out of the corner of his eye, though hers staying stubbornly averted from him. “So how are you?” He pressed. 

“I’m fine.” 

“Mmmmhm.” 

“Well… I am now. I just hate shopping. I hate clothes. “ Maia admitted, rubbing her forearms. “And I hate dresses. They always make it obvious.” 

Magnus nodded, scratching the back of his head, “I have the same issue with suits. They aren’t designed for someone with hips.”

Maia turned to face him. “But you always look amazing.” 

“Well, so do you.” Magnus told her, which made her scoff. “Are you kidding? You don’t have anything tailored and you still manage to look great. Really. Your clothes are good. And once I’m done with this dress, I promise you the biggest gender euphoria high of your life.” 

“That’s a big ask,” Maia warned him.

Magnus shrugged. “I’m just that good.” 

“If I didn’t know you better I’d doubt that.” 

They descended into silence once more, Magnus watching Maia watch the sky. “You look sad,” he observed.

“I’m not sad, I’m just…” Maia searched for the word, her eyebrows furrowing. “I don’t know. I’m sort of dreading your wedding.” 

Magnus hummed, nodding his head. “I can see that.” 

“I love Izzy. More than anything. But standing next to her is hard sometimes.” 

“Yeah,” Magnus murmured, “I know how that feels.” 

“She’s so beautiful, and her body is perfect. I feel…”

“Like a donkey standing next to a prize stallion.” Magnus guessed, a grim look on his face. Maia shrugged one shoulder, nodding. “Yep, that feeling is intimately familiar to me.”

“With Alec?” Maia asked. 

“Oh, no,” Magnus assured her, “from before. I didn’t take hormones for the first three hundreds years of my life. I looked very strange standing next to my cis male partners before that.” 

Maia worried her lower lip between her teeth. “How’d you get round it?”

Magnus smiled nostalgically. “I trusted in their love, and the beauty they saw in me.” 

“I trust Izzy. I just… Ugh, I don’t know. I hate shopping. It brings out all my insecurities, and I hate it.” Maia groaned, raking her fingers through her hair. 

“Shopping is indeed the worst,” Magnus sympathised, putting his arm around her shoulder. “But just try to remember that you are not the only person to go through any of this. You have me, and Alec. We’re always here if you need to talk about any of these things. And Izzy is pretty great too, for a cis person.” 

Maia smiled, letting her head rest on his shoulder. “Yeah, she is.” 

Izzy cleared her throat behind them. The breath was knocked out of Maia when she laid eyes on her girlfriend. The navy of the gown looked gorgeous with her skin tone and her inky, thick hair. The sweetheart neckline brought Maia’s attention right to Izzy’s runed cleavage, and she forced her eyes away to look at the rest of the dress. The bodice was made of folded chiffon, brought down to a neat waistline with a thin bow cinching it in slightly, the skirt falling perfectly over Izzy’s natural hips and down to the floor. It was held up by a fan-shaped strap, covering the curve of Izzy’s shoulder with a translucent layer of chiffon. 

“You look so beautiful,” Maia told her, and Izzy smiled, raising her chin. Maia knew that Izzy didn’t need to be told, but she liked to say it anyway. 

“You do,” Magnus agreed “and it fits damn near perfectly. I swear you Lightwoods are mannequins come to life,” he snorted, walking over to Izzy to give the strap a magical adjustment, shortening it a little to give Izzy’s boobs a little more support.

“I love it,” Izzy said, looking down at the dress, smoothing it down. “It’s not too heavy, either, so it should be good to wear all day.”

“Yeah,” Maia nodded, unable to tear her eyes away. “You’re so beautiful.” 

Izzy laughed, her eyes fond. “You already said.”

“Well, yeah, but…” Maia wrapped her arms around Izzy’s neck. “It’s true.”

“You should get in yours so I can compliment you back.” Izzy coaxed, nodding towards Maia’s dress, still hanging up. 

“Yes, I’m just about done.” Magnus speculated, stepping back to take a look at her. 

Maia took her own dress down from the rail and went into Magnus and Alec’s bedroom, undressing quickly. She stepped into the gown and pulled it up over her body, contorting her arms to zip it up as high as she could. How on Earth had Izzy managed to reach? After a couple of minutes of wiggling, Maia accepted defeat and headed back out to the living room, where Izzy was still standing in her dress, waiting for her. 

Izzy’s eyes sparkled with admiration as she stepped out, and Maia was empowered to hold herself a little higher, pushing aside the sinking feeling that the dress didn’t fit her. “You look amazing.”

“It doesn’t really fit.” Maia shrugged, tugging at the loose fabric around her hips. She was avoiding the shoulders completely, because they were stretching the wide straps to breaking point.

“I’ll have that fixed in a moment,” Magnus promised, flicking magic at her, zipping the dress up to the top before anything else. The dress molded to her body, expanding out in some places and tightening up in others, and Maia looked down, her eyes on the sparks of blue.

After a couple of minutes, Magnus stepped back to take a look at her, and let out a low whistle. “You’ve got a good eye. It looks great!” 

“Yeah, you look… Beyond gorgeous, babe.” Izzy breathed, turning Maia to look in the full-length mirror.

The first thing that Maia’s eyes went to were her shoulders. Magnus had altered the design slightly, making the top layer of chiffon over the straps a little bigger, to make her shoulders look smaller. Instead of lingering at the breadth of them, Maia’s eye was drawn down the ruffle to her chest, which had been given a little boost by the flattering shift of fabric. Her hips were still thin, but her waist was cinched in, which gave her a womanly curve that made her heart lift. She turned a little, looking at herself from a bunch of other angles, and found no discernable sign that she was…

“Wow,” she said, nodding a little. “Magnus, you really are magic.” 

Magnus and Izzy chuckled lightly, and Izzy hugged her from the side. 

“This is how I see you, always,” Izzy murmured, her arms tightening around Maia’s waist. 

Maia was too overwhelmed to reply, so she just looked in the mirror at the two of them stood against each other. For once, Maia held her own. She didn’t feel lesser in any way, she looked right. Like she belonged next to Izzy. She kissed the top of Izzy’s head and sighed, nuzzling into her hair.


End file.
